The little Puddlecotes have already learned ... the climate change mantra off by heart (and ad nauseam); about Nelson Mandela and the evil white person in South Africa, reactionary lefty poets and the marvels of India; the perils of being a Muslim in 1947 Pakistan; essential skills such as bag-packing and nail beauty; and the political might of the Green Party.
Today, the girl proudly informed me - as I was jostling for position with a couple of grannies for the marked down goods in Tesco - that she is being taught all about triangular trade.
While involved in a tug-o-war over a rather nice tray of pork medallions, I asked how it worked.
"Well", she replied, "England sells guns and ammunition to Africa, and that buys slaves. They are sold to America and England gets sugar, coffee and tobacco.". As the tenacious oxygen-robber finally admitted defeat and removed her fingernails from the cellophane, I made sure that the little P was aware this was a historical trade. Fortunately, she nodded and confirmed that she knew this. "Yes, we're learning all about slaves and racial integration. That's why we're going to watch Hairspray later in the week.".
So that's all right then.
Do you know what? I reckon she is already full to the brim with right-on guardianista ideology at the age of 10. Don't it make ya proud? Almost fully primed for transition into secondary school where these raw ideas can be carefully honed to produce a fully-formed righteous offence-taker.
So much better than in my day at that age, when we learned useless stuff like times tables, spelling, grammar, the Battle of Hastings and world capital cities.
Now, if you'll just excuse me, I'm off to place my face in a pillow and scream.